28 October 2010

Thursday, October 28, 2010 - ,, 8 comments

Beauty is in the eye of ourselves first and formost.

Growing up I was afflicted with horrible acne and it went with me into adulthood and even now there are days when I just wanna crawl under a rock.  No amount of make up can cover the scars from years of  dealing with a bad complexion.  If you've ever suffered with acne you know the pain, long term emotional wounds and have spent many a dollar on some miracle product.  It just plain sucks all the way around.  As I have begun to age and see myself through my own eyes instead of others, I have come to terms with my scars and the occasional breakout.  This is who I am and I've come to actually find my face beautiful instead of scary...I love what age and growth do that to a person, the key though is to pass that on to your children.

Over the years I have watched my sons baby skin begin to change and start to resemble a face I once stared at many a day and night.  Immediately I got him started on a treatment program and prayed that he would not be cursed with the same skin as me.  My prayers were not answered.   Now it's pretty darn clear that he inherited my lovely genes in that department instead of his dads perfect skin.  And he knows this as he's mentioned it many times.  My poor child is all I think to myself somedays.  Then somedays I also want to knock him upside the head when he says he "forgot" to wash his face for the last two days or that it's just too much work to deal with it.  Unfortunately it's going to be a lifetime of work to deal with.

In the beginning his ever growing zit population didn't seem to bother him much.  I hounded him to keep at it.  I also kept quiet about it until he asked what the problem was.  All the while knowing what would soon be happening because once the hormones go into full on attack mode so do the comments from others.  That hasn't changed in the twenty years since I was a zit faced high schooler and unfortunately I doubt it ever will...mean people just continue to grow and breed.   It's facing those bullies that's hard and even harder to help your child understand why and how to deal with them.  So yes, the awful comments have started and all I want to do is protect my baby and wipe away the emotional scars that will soon begin to root their way into his soul.  Right now he's mad and has every right to be.  He wants an instant cure.  He just wants any mark on his face to disappear and never return.  

He didn't ask for this, no one does.  All I can do for him is support his emotions and his being and continue to reassure him that he is in fact beautiful and handsome and smart and drop dead gorgeous!   And at the same time I have to deal with my own memories of the voices who once said my face was a mountain range or looked like sandpaper and deal with the guilt that I have passed this on to my own child.  No one ever said parenting was a piece of cake but it's so easy to forget that what our children deal with can make parenting look painless.  It's all in how we deal with their pain that will help them to understand just how amazingly beautiful they are inside and most importantly on the outside.

So I leave this post with a picture of the two of us from China when the hormonal change was beginning to take over.  Before I was asked to "remove all facial yuck from my face" in any picture I posted here.  This is just us.  Untouched.  Just us in all our God given beauty!  And I know someday my son will too see the amazing being God created in him and that what we deal with today will make us better people for tomorrow.  


Kayce, I'm sure you've already taken him to the dermatologist, but just in case, I'm here to tell you that the antibiotics and oral meds have come a long way since our teen years! My Jake has just started showing the odd zit or two and although I think he will be fortunate and have my skin (I was clear through high school and college, but now in my 40s, I struggle!) and I took him right in for a treatment plan... he too, btw, tells me it's "too much work"... to wash his face?! Good luck to your handsome son... I think being the strong and focused young man that he is will help him keep a balanced perspective. xo

You are both beautiful, inside and out!

I can't wait to see you. :)

Hey Kayce, I suffered from acne, too! Still do! Anyways, just wanted to repeat what Kristin said about the dermatologist..... Also, our neighbor boy gets regular facials, and they helps him a lot!!!!!!

...simply beautiful...xoxo,me

My son is going through the same thing : ( It hurts. My mom works for a dermatologist and that doesn't seem to help either. Something my son didn't get from me is FRECKLES. I have a MILLION and just recently told him a story of how a child told me a few years back that my face looked like SALAMI ! You can't help but to chuckle at that...hehehe.

My nephew has the same thing going on. It breaks my heart. I just wanna take that pain away from him. And yes... some days he's too lazy to wash his face even though my sister has invested in expensive cleansing products. Teenage boys...ugh! LOL!

Hugs to you both.

Love the picture and the background is just as beautiful! I'm sure you probably have tried it, but in case you haven't, Proactive really does work! You could even buy it at the mall now. Good luck!

My heart is breaking! I remember all too well the remarks I got about my face and my acne. I also got the comments about my elephant ears and caused me to wear my hear down around my face for a very long time. Kids can be so cruel and I don't look forward to my children going throught that.